Hai from Shanghai
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Showing posts tagged food and drink
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Upon being charged 39 RMB for a takeout dish that was supposed to cost 26 RMB...
- Me [pointing back and forth between the item on the menu I thought I'd ordered and the price they'd written down]: Why?
- Takeout Lady: Bonus. We give bonus.
- Me: Um, OK?
- Takeout Lady: Bonus. You will like.
- Me: Um, OK. Thanks.
- Me [internal monologue]: I wish I knew enough Mandarin to explain to them the concept of "bonus."
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“It is perfectly wholesome and nutritious,” eh? The label doth protest too much, methinks.
(And yes, I bought this just so I could mock it in this post.)
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Made my first trip to a Western grocery store the other day. The prices for imported foods are exorbitant, as I knew they would be. A box of Oh’s costs 68 RMB (more than $10); Cinnamon Toast Crunch is even more.
Apparently the government maintains price caps on food and drink it deems “essential.” Thus, rice and tea (and chicken feet, and pig’s blood…) will always be affordable for locals, regardless of supply and demand, while those who push COCO BALLS and KOKO KRUNCH have free (market) reign to charge what they want. Things like butter, cheese, coffee, and tomato sauce are considered luxury goods here. (That coffee is considered a non-essential foodstuff is perhaps the best indication of the Chinese government’s intolerance of all things worthwhile.) I doubt I’ll reach the point where I won’t splurge for the aforementioned, but you’re probably looking at my last box of Crunchy, Dainty Wheat Poppies With Honey.
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”I think the thing I admire most about the Chinese is that they’re hanging in there with the chopsticks. Because, if you think about it, you know, they’ve seen the fork by now. I’m sure they’ve seen the spoon. They’re going, “Yeah, yeah, they’re OK; we’re going to stay with the sticks.” I mean, I don’t know how they’ve missed it. Thousands of years ago, Chinese farmer gets up, has his breakfast with the chopsticks, goes out and works all day in the field with a shovel…. Hello? Shovel! Not going out there plowing 40 acres with a couple of pool cues…
Jerry Seinfeld, c. 1993
I mostly do as the Romans, but let’s be honest, chopsticks are useless. When possible, I use them as a purely supplementary utensil.
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I bought this hoping it was cooking oil. Then I opened it and took a whiff and smelled something I’d never smelled before. Now I’m not sure what I bought. But the lesbian martial-artist on the bottle washes away the pain of the wasted 12 yuan.
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Likes
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They almost fooled me…
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CYBERDOG
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SHANGHAI’S GANGNAM GRANNIES
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HOW MY ST PATRICK'S DAY ENDED
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Huskies look pretty pumped to be taking part in a training session at Feshiebridge, in Aviemore,...
